Handwriting

I was around 11 years old when I saw my friend’s handwriting so beautiful that I copied, trying to look exactly the same. Like this,

Today is Friday.

Almost like this font.

So, one day, the teacher called me out to her desk and ask if the work done is handwritten by me. I said yes. The class became tensed. She asked for the second time and I said yes (not knowing she doubt I changed my handwriting). She glared at me and said between her gritted teeth, trying to control her anger (that’s what I see) and I still said the same answer. She asked again, “It’s your mum’s handwriting, right?” I said it was mine. Whilst I was standing beside her, I wondered, Why is she asking this? She never asked her (my friend which I mentioned above). Sort of the teacher thinks I lied and it didn’t work no matter how confident I said it was my handwriting.

When I was 12 years old, I found another handwriting. It was my friend’s elder sister’s.

Siti Amirah

I just remember the S and the A because it was hard and I practice A LOT until I succeed. At that time, my curiosity was over 100%. I have that big Q in my head, “How can I not know there are other forms of handwriting? I thought doctors and teachers are the only ones that differs from us!” So, whenever I sit in front of the computer (back then computer is much cooler than laptop prolly because I’ve never seen laptop, I guess), I look for the font which is similar to it and I learn how to wrote it from a to z, from capital to small letters.

I copied every single handwriting I’ve never seen before and I thought mine is ugly. I tried to change it to make it more beautiful like how I’ve seen in others’. Some people said my handwriting is ‘very neat’ but it looks so plain jane to me.

When I moved to a new school, I wasn’t in a mixed class. After I get to hang around with them, y’know, getting to know better kind of thing, I found out almost all the girls has the same handwriting. From daily to design. “Why does it have to look sooooo familiar? This isn’t creative. So boring.” Because there aren’t much one of a kind handwriting, I copied their handwriting. At one point, I try to make a new handwriting that differs from the girls. I get bored seeing the same thing here and there, all over the place.

Until that one day, a relief teacher came to a class and shared his knowledge of reading someone’s handwriting. He said, “It may be right and wrong but this is what I’ve learnt. If you’re curious if I get the fact right, you can show your handwriting to me.” All the girls agreed. I can’t remember what we’re supposed to write.

During those days, I wrote (somehow) like this,

Saya nak makan.

When I received back my paper, it goes (somehow) …

‘There’s no need of you to imitate someone’s handwriting or create a new one. Be confident in yours. Your handwriting is beautiful (alright),’

How did he know so well?! Ok fine, I’ll stick to my original handwriting.

But I never get to rid of the habit to copy someone’s handwriting. It went on and on until that one day when I said to myself that this is exhausting. I can use it as a medium to design something but not applying it to my daily handwriting. And I am comfortable from then on.